Two on a Guillotine (1965)

Pretty Cassie (Connie Stevens) inherits the estate from her estranged, eccentric, magician dad (Cesar Romero), and is required to stay one week in his spooky mansion. A charming reporter (Dean Jones) weasels his way into the story. Will love bloom?

I grew up with the Love Bug movies. Dean Jones starred in two of the five or six in the Herbie Cinematic Universe. Ken Berry replaced him for the first sequel which may explain why I confuse the two actors. Jones, like Stevens, specialized in the lightest of light comedies. Connie was hoping to expand her acting range with this film, but it turned out to be a serious flop.

The movie was directed by William Conrad, whom my set will remember as TV’s Cannon (or from Jake and the Fatman for the slightly younger). He did a fair amount of TV directing, but only four features. He was known for getting a lot done on a tiny budget.

My problem is that Two on a Guillotine doesn’t know what it wants to be. It's labeled Horror but it’s really a horror themed mystery rom-com. There is space for light horror (looking at you, William Castle), but this was light to the exclusion of any real horror element. Which is a shame because the setting could have led into some great atmosphere, but we are only teased with it. Dead dad booby-trapped his mansion and I would have liked to have seen more of that.

All that aside, Two on a Guillotine is a reasonable watch. There are some clever elements in there. Just temper your expectations. It's a fair rom-com, but it could have been so much more. AMRU 3.

The Spy Who Came in from the Cold (1965)

After yet another cold war informant is executed, a British operative (Richard Burton) goes on one last mission. He offers carefully crafted information for sale to the East that will incriminate his adversary. Not everything goes to plan.

First Richard Burton film, like, ever. Haven’t seen his sometimes wife for the blog yet and I expected to get a two for one with Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, still on my DVR. Burton wanted Taylor to play his love interest but Claire Bloom was cast instead.

Slow, plodding, and dreary, the story is surprisingly engaging. Burton played a borderline drunk, which must have been quite a stretch for him, what with him being a roaring drunk. Filming would occasionally be interrupted by his and Taylor’s drunken behavior. The character’s age was changed from 50 to 39, Burton’s age at the time, but he looked every bit of 50, and more. He would die at fifty eight.

The Spy Who Came in from the Cold is a compelling if confounding story. Its tone is quite different from most movies of the day and the viewer is tossed in many directions. Also, Burton barely emoted at all. It will stand up to a second viewing. I still have one puzzle about the ending to solve. AMRU 4.

“Fiedler's a Jew, of course, and Mundt's quite the other thing.”

Alphaville (1965)

A reporter arrives in Alphaville from the “Outer Countries”, looking for Professor Von Braun and asking a lot of questions. Slowly he learns the true nature of Alphaville and Alpha 60, even if little of it makes much sense to the viewer.

Ostensibly this is Film-Noir, but it reads like a parody of the genre. Our protagonist behaves like a jerk, slapping people, acting misogynistic, and getting into random violence and gun play. I know, but I mean inappropriately so. I sense the director (Jean-Luc Godard) is making a statement about the hard-boiled detective trope and American cinema in general, and it is not a favorable one. Every adherence to the genre felt like an exaggeration to point out its absurdity.

But calling it science fiction is a taller order. It is said to be set in a dystopian future where computers control everyone’s thoughts, but there was no attempt to camouflage present era Paris. 1960’s locations, cars, and other technology are plainly used. Again, I feel the intent of the director. While real sci-fi explores modern society using a fanciful story and out-of-this-world setting, here the director presents his story with nothing more than sci-fi lip service. It’s a dystopian future, and it is today. The Alpha 60 computer is the only technology presented, and it seemed out of place in the world presented.

The unpleasant voice of Alpha 60 was recorded by a man with his voice box removed due to cancer. But this is not by far the most unpleasant aspect. The nonsensical dialog gave it a pretentious air and the herky-jerky editing made it hard to follow the action, principally the fight scenes. And occasionally scenes go reverse negative, because that’s artsy.

I understand that seamful editing was a French New Wave thing, to call attention to the existence of the film. An Intention of Disbelief, if you will. And perhaps the noir genre was more than a little dated by 1965, and deserved criticism. But Alphaville is confoundingly respected in both genres, and I don’t believe it respects them.

The story is tedious and absurd, the edits abrupt and disjointed, the dialog utterly nonsensical, and the character behavior is ridiculous. This was all a conscious decision by the director, but that doesn’t make it an easier watch. If you think French cinema is pompous and pretentious, I present to you exhibit Alpha. AMRU 2.

“Yes, I am afraid of death. But for a humble secret agent, it's an everyday thing, like whiskey. And I've been drinking all my life.”

She (1965)

Three veterans from the great war, Professor Holly (Peter Cushing), young Leo (John Richardson), and manservant Job, are in Palestine for some reason. When trying to score with a young hottie, poor Leo is shanghaied. He awakes in a palace and is greeted by the beautiful Ayesha (Ursula Andress) who gives him a ring and tells him to give it back to her when they meet again. It’s unclear why. To help him find her again, She gives him a map to a lost Egyptian city that is less detailed than a Denny’s place mat.

So our heroes go looking for this lost city and meet up with trouble as well as the young hottie from the first act. Turns out She, that is Ayesha, is thousands of years old and has been waiting for the return of her departed love. Ayesha is She who waits. Does young Leo look exactly like her departed love? Of course he does.

Based on the same book as the 1935 version, it is one of a dozen or so adaptations. Being somewhat closer to the source material, the setting and initial motivation differ, but the story is essentially the same. Immortal queen from exotic culture waiting for the reincarnation of her dead lover, plus mentor, manservant, and humble hottie along in tow. Leo tries to resist but Ayesha is She who must be obeyed. 

I’m not a big fan of the Hammer aesthetic. The ancient buildings all look freshly painted and the flora look plastic. I mean, they are, but do they need to look like it? It takes away from the atmosphere and attitude that the better of the old time films had. In fairness their intent was to look different and to trade in a small serving of sex appeal and gore.

The source material is a story of Eurocentrism and unabashed colonialism. Originally set in the African interior, Ayesha was the White Queen amongst, you know, those people. Now moved to Egypt and pretty much everyone in the lost city are honkies. Toned down somewhat for sixties audiences, it becomes more a story of the aggressive woman, sexually and politically. Something men of all times fear, Victorian era, the teens, the 60’s, and even today.

She (1965), as it stands, is fairly nonsensical. Why give Leo a ring for him to give right back (and then not take it)? Christopher Lee has so little to do it was a waste to even cast him. Ayesha is irresistibly alluring as well as frighteningly terrible, but we don’t really see it. They tried to touch on smaller story elements that you just can’t explore properly in a 100 minute film. As is, it’s an amusing distraction. Andress is great and all, but for my money I would have stuck with the hottie Ustane. AMRU 3.

The Sound of Music (1965)

Young Maria (Julie Andrews) is a misfit at a convent, so they convince her to take the job of a governess of seven children (the oldest is sixteen, going on seventeen), of a military disciplinarian. Who hates Nazis.

Loosely based on real life, what actually happened over two decades is depicted over a few months. There are a great many other inaccuracies, but I won’t bore you with Wikipedia stuff. What’s interesting about this movie? If you know it only by pop culture references, you may be surprised by the presence of Nazis. They are actually a foundational part of the story. What shouldn’t be surprising is that Julie Andrews is wonderful and lights up the screen every time she’s on, which is virtually every frame.

Grumpy Christopher Plummer, who hated making the film and hated the end product, called working with Andrews as being hit over the head with a Valentine’s day card every day. He used an old actors technique to get himself through the shoot called drink-yourself-blotto. Maybe his malcontentedness helped him channel his inner jerk. Real father Georg wasn’t the dower soul as he is depicted. The real Maria and Von Trapp children asked to have his character soften, but what fun would that be. Maria was something of a pest on the set.

The Sound of Music is a wonderfully looking film. The combination of fluffy songs with evading the Nazis tied up in a Rom Com format is unexpectedly enjoyable. Robert Wise knows how to shoot a film and is a much underrated director. AMRU 4.

“The poor didn’t want this one.”

Repulsion (1965)

Pretty-pretty Carol (Catherine Deneuve) can't help but attract the attention of men, but she has something of an aversion to them. One might call it a repulsion. She is disturbed by her sister's relationship with a married man. When sis and stud-muffin go for an extended holiday, Carol's problems deepen.

Claustrophobic photography, odd angles, strange soundtrack, this slow burn takes some time to build up. Catherine is initially unimpressive (acting-wise, anyhow) as she sleep walks through her scenes. But things get going, and boy do they ever. Carol's descent into madness is frighteningly dark and disturbingly realistic.

I don't wish to give too much away, but this physiological thriller expands the definition of Horror (for me, anyhow). There are many elements that contribute to the storytelling. The viewer is left with questions, like what is and isn't real, what happened in Carol's past, and what happens next. The pacing and non-Hollywood style will put off some, but this is a singular movie. Expertly crafted and great conversation fodder. AMRU 4.

Thunderball (1965)

SPECTRE has stolen two nuclear warheads (or, "Thunderballs", if you will) and threatens to blow up either a British or American city if they don't pay his demands. Bond is sent in to slut around for a while and, if possible, solve the case.

Goldfinger was supposed to be next but come showtime, netflix couldn't get it to work. So, I went to Bond number 4. Not too bad, except the final reel consisted of an ungodly tedious underwater fight scene with spear guns (they never show anyone ever reloading) and a pointlessly long boat chase. Shorten both and you have a better movie. Not much else to say. Typical stuff. Smarmy comments, clever gadgets, gratuitous action and babes. Booty count of four. AMRU of 3.

"Do you mind if my friend sits this one out? She's just dead."

Die, Monster, Die! (1965)

I saw this as a kid. I remember Boris Karloff in a wheelchair. I remember a tarantula. And I remember something about a green, glowing rock. I didn't remember that it was in color. Maybe I watched it on a B&W set.

Hunky Stephen Reinhart (Nick Adams) visits the remote mansion estate of his girlfriend, the hot Susan Witley (Suzan Farmer). The townspeople refuse to assist him, or even let him rent a bicycle to get there. Nor will they tell him why. So, he walks. The land around the mansion is strangely dead and black.

O'll dad (Boris Karloff) gives him a rather hostile reception, but it wasn't Susan that invited him. It was her mom. Mom is bed-ridden and hides behind curtains. Her instructions: take Susan away from there.

Susan doesn't want to go while her mom is sick, dad acts strange, and the butler bursts into flames. Maybe the answer is in the greenhouse! I'll spoil no more.

Much of the logic of this story is best ignored. That said, it stays fairly true to it's roots of gothic roots. Spooky mansion, deep in the country, suspicious townspeople, and references to satanism. Boris was clearly on the back nine of his career and life. Less than four years later, he'd be gone. Still, he doesn't disappoint. Nick Adams was well cast in his role, and he would be outlived by Boris by a year. Drugs are bad, hmmm ok?

I will quibble about the title. Die, Monster, Die? Sounds like Russ Meyer's version of a Godzilla film. Online sources call Susan Stephen's fiance', but I don't recall that ever being established. At first they just seemed like college friends.

Good movie. It had atmosphere, good suspense, and interesting story line. AMRU 3.5.

This the first Karloff movie I've done? Seriously?

The Cincinnati Kid (1965)

Steve McQueen is the Kid, a young hot-shot poker player ready to take on Mr. Big. Mr. Big is Lacey Howard (Edward G. Robinson). The story is about The Kid's life, the events leading up to the big game, and the game itself.

McQueen's girlfriend is played by Tuesday Weld, so life isn't TOO bad for him. His best friend is by-the-books, strictly percentages Karl Malden. Karl (in his pre-gigantic nose days) is comically paired with Ann-Margret. Could two people, actors or characters, be more ill-fit for each other? The tension plays into the plot.

I love poker, so I had a hook into this film, but I think non players would also dig it. Tense drama, great acting, great story telling, and, oh yea ...

Ann-Margret was NASTY HOT!

This woman stole every scene she was in. She could be in the background and out of focus and draw the eye. She had this intense-malicious-sexy look on her face the entire time. Man, was she smokin'! She could do more in a turtleneck and coveralls than most woman could in the buff! Add to that fact she was married to Mister Straight-Lace Malden and hanging around with the church mouse (and hot) Tuesday Weld, the tension was palpable.

Robinson impressed me. He was perfect in the role. I always thought of him as a two-dimensional actor. Must rethink that now. Rip Torn was great (only knew him from Men in Black) as a slimy manipulator. The background characters included Jack Weston, Joan Blondell, Dub Taylor, and oddly, Cab Calloway. Too bad he didn't sing. Joan was awesome as a dealer. A small role, but she shined.

While I enjoy seeing Steve McQueen on screen, I can't say I'm impressed by his acting. He seems to play one character: Steve McQueen. I know people who know more about acting will strongly disagree, but they can say so on THEIR movie blog.

As a poker player, the lingo and depiction was fairly good. They announce that there will be no string raises, and of course they string raise throughout. Stuff like that aside, it was fine. They should have played with chips, but I guess having wads of cash on the table was more dramatic. I haven't looked into this, but I got the impression that Rounders (1998) was sort of a sequel. It seems to start where The Cincinnati Kid ends. I hope that's not a spoiler.

I've waffled back and forth whether to give this film a 4 or 4.5. It's not really the kind of movie you can watch over and over again. In the end I'll settle on an AMRU of 4.